Posted on | November 9, 2012 | 3 Comments
Are you the eldest child in your family? Do your parents put you in charge of your younger siblings whenever they are not around? Do you have hard-headed, naughty and difficult-to-deal-with siblings? If yes, then we share exactly the same dilemma my friend.
Being the eldest child means that you are second in command whenever your parents are away. But how do we make our siblings obey and respect us the way they obey and respect our parents? Here are some tips I learned from personal experiences and encounter.
1. Stop the motherly or fatherly act.
They don’t need another mom or dad. What they need is a dependable and trust-worthy older sibling they can respect and follow. One set of parent is more than enough for any child. Do not copy your mom or dad’s way of discipline just to make your siblings obey. Your authority as the one “IN CHARGE” does not include pronouncing punishment over your siblings.
2. Obedience needs to be from respect not from fear.
It takes more than just fear to make children obey. Obedience requires respect, and respect needs to be earned. People who obey out of fear tend to be the ones who harbors hatred and rebel more. And if you plant fear and hatred in your siblings’ hearts, when they grow old enough that they no longer have to obey you, you will reap disrespect. To earn their respect, be a man of your words. When you say something, do it. Show them that you know what you are doing and that you are doing the right thing. Do not show rebellious behavior. If they see you not obeying your parents, they will most certainly disobey you as well. Once you earn their respect, they will obey you because they look up to you and obedience will follow. Just take for example our favorite superheroes. We imitate them, because we idolize them because they are doing extremely good stuff. It’s the same for our siblings. They will obey if we show them how to obey and respect.
3. Make your siblings your friends
Most older siblings take the role of a dictator making their younger siblings their enemies. Why pronounce war when you can be allies and have a really good time? As the older sibling, you should take the initiative in having a closer relationship with your siblings. Take the first step. When your parents aren’t around, why not start a game of cards or watch the latest animated or sci-fi movie in your house? Buy some chips and drinks (wholesome drinks only if kids are around please) and let the party started! If you can have great fun playing your friends, there is no reason at all why you can’t with your siblings. Treating your siblings as friends can make your sibling-bond stronger. The more you make it strong, the harder it is for anything or anyone to tear you apart.
I must admit that as the eldest child in the family I failed to do some of the things I wrote here. But if I would be given a chance, I would grab every opportunity there is to make it up to my siblings. Now is the time to do it. Build a stronger bond with your siblings and discover for yourself the overwhelming results of having a closer and stronger family.
How do you spend time with your siblings? Use the comment section below and share with us how else we can build a closer sibling-bond.